Thursday, April 19, 2012

Best Of Blockhead: Showdown After Sundown (February 08,2007)

It is a cold and frosty night along the border between the den and dinning room. The only light comes from a single lamp off in the background. The two gunslingers now staring each other down have never been the greatest of friends and it seems a line has been crossed.

Baby Fred sits firm holding the cat toy in his hand like a lion tamer grasping his whip. Across the five-foot expanse ready to pounce at a moments notice, Buttons the 20lb cat can only think of one thing “That there’s my toy and I reckon I’m about to take it from ya.”

Lucy and I are motionless waiting to step in on behalf of the baby at the slightest twitch of a tail or crack of cotton whip. Neither side budges. Suddenly Fred swings the whip over his head “Whakish Whakish” “Chirp Chirp Chirp” goes the fake bird noise inside the cat toy. Button’s back legs start gearing up like the Road-Runner about to be chased by Wyle Coyote. It is now or never. If he backs away from this battle his reputation as the King of Everything Below 3 Feet would be forever tarnished. Dare he give up his seniority to this drooling, infant that doesn’t even know how to use a litter box? “Somebody must lose this contest young bottle drinker,” says Buttons as he inchs his front paws forward while arching his back.

Baby Fred isn’t about give up what he considered to be “his” new toy. Not only does it have a cool handle, but also just like his furry, tuna-eating counterpart, Fred just can’t resist the chirping noise. The stage is set. Who will make the move first?

In a flash Buttons leaps up out of his stance and is about to grab what was rightfully his!! Until in mid-air he locks eyes with the only thing that can stop his forward assault….DADDY!!

Heart broken and with nothing left to do but tuck his tail, Buttons turns around and decides to play with Lucy’s shoe instead.

There Fred sits basking in the glow of his victory. Swirling the cat toy around his head…but wait Daddy has other plans. “Let’s just put this up for now, Little Man. I don’t want the cat to eat you for dinner when I’m not looking.”
Disgusted all Fred can do is scream “WWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!”

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