Sunday, May 24, 2009

Previews Of Times Gone By

When you have your first child there quickly comes many a moment when you find yourself awake at 2:00 A.M. staring at the ceiling and wondering "What was I thinking?" Sure you love the crying thing in the next room with all your heart, but after 3 hours of screaming without any indication as to what is wrong it's easy to see why even the strongest among us would start questioning their ability to make rationale decisions.

Thankfully somewhere along the way God through his infinite wisdom manages to cloud your mind. Those moments spent pulling out your hair as you stare at your child in disbelief just moments after he emptied the entire contents of the bathtub (water and all) onto your newly tiled floor, fade from your memory and somehow become funny stories you can't wait to tell to all of your friends. Maybe it's some form of selective memory brought on by the constant shock and awe that comes from having a child. It could be that the insanity that seems to swirl around your child finally manages to consume you as well.

I like to think that God knows that the only way people would ever decide to have more than one child and thus continue the furthering of the species would be to simply edit their memories so that when they do look back they only see the good parts. Kinda like movie previews in reverse. Instead of that time your child screamed in the middle of church that somebody wasn't praying right....you see how excited they get when they learn they get to go to Sunday school. You forget that night you were scared to death because he had a fever of 105 and wouldn't quit throwing up....and remember the first time he learned to potty by himself. You only see him lying their sleeping peacefully and not the hours of threatening to make his life miserable if he didn't take a nap.

Now I'm not sitting here saying that we are actively trying to have another child...honestly that would be way too personal for even these pages....what I am saying is that lately my mind isn't what it used to be. When I look back at those first few months when we had Fred I don't remember the fear of not knowing what I was getting into. I don't see the pain brought on from having to spank him for the first time. I don't remember how much I disliked having to share my bed or change dirty diapers or waking up at all hours of the night to give him a bottle....all I see are moments I'd like to live through again....all I see are previews.

Monday, May 18, 2009

A Visit To See An Old Friend

Daddy, What are we doing here?
Well, I have an old friend around here somewhere and I thought we would pay him a visit.
Do you see your friend Daddy?
Um...not really...but this is where he hangs out.
Is your friend far away?
Not all the time. Sometimes he feels like he's standing just over my shoulder.
My friend would really like you Fred.
I bet I would really like him too Daddy!
Wow this hole is big.
My friend was a pretty big guy.
Well I just wanted to come buy and see how he was doing.
Time to go see Mommy, Daddy?
Yep, I guess it's time to go see Mommy
Daddy, Is your friend your Daddy?
Um...well...for a very long time, yes he was my Daddy.
(How did he know that?)


Monday, May 11, 2009

The Toboggan Conundrum

I'm sure that by taking a look at the picture above several thoughts have crossed your mind. "What a lovely family this guy has" the answer to which is yes I do thank you for thinking so. "Oh that's why they weren't at church this past weekend. They are on vacation" Ummm Yes and No. Yes we weren't at church yesterday because we were out of town. No this picture was actually taken last year

No doubt though if given enough time more than likely some where down the line the thought "Man that kid has a lot of hair" will pop in and out of your mind. The answer to this is both the reason I'm writing today and also something that has been on my mind quite a bit lately. You see all that hair blowing in the wind. That hair is thick! Those just aren't a few bunched up strands of long brown hair being tossed around. That is a birds nest of curls, tangles, and knots that must be combed good everyday and not voluntarily either.

Now allow me to step away from the hair thing for a moment. Check out the color in those cheeks. That pinkish hue which occurs after a child has played his heart out all day. A look that only comes from running too, fleeing from, jumping off, climbing up, and tripping over everything in his path. He had that look last year when this picture was taken, two days ago after playing in the yard, and tomorrow after driving his mother crazy all day.

What's my point you ask? It's this....how can this child who has all this hair on top of his head which constantly serves as built in insulation locking in and ensnaring everything that gets caught in it....how can this curly headed boy with so much energy continuously pumping through his veins so much so that his faces pulsates heat like a mini-gasoline heater....how can this child think that he is so cold at night that even with the thermostat set at 70 degrees, a sheet, a quilt, and a comforter placed gingerly on top of him, plus a set of flannel pajamas covering him from neck to toe...how can he still be so cold that his insists on wearing a toboggan to bed!