In case you haven't guessed or heard through the grapevine, Lucy is pregnant. In some ways I'm still in shock. 3 days after I got the news I asked her to take another test just in case the three she took days before (two of which were at the Dr's office) were incorrect. Not because I didn't want a child, more so because it's one thing to plan an event and another thing for it to happen exactly the way you had hoped.
So here I am almost a week to the day that I learned I was the father of two and already subtle changes are taking place (and not just inside Lucy). Fred who proclaimed he'd rather have a cheese pizza when he first heard the news, is bragging to all who will listen of his new position as Big Brother; our inability to keep a secret ensured that just about everyone we know has heard the news; and the question on the tip of every one's tongue is "What kind do we want?"
The answer to this of course is the same for every expectant mother and father regardless of how many already make up their brood; a healthy child free of any complications is what we all pray for. Besides that I think for now I'm more focused on prepping myself for the journey that lays ahead. The late night feedings, the constant crying (I've gotten used to Fred just telling us what he wants), another round of diapers, of first foods, first steps, potty training. Plus let's not forget that Fred isn't headed off to college to live in a dorm somewhere. Some of his best first times are yet to come; reading his first words, writing for the first time, first day of kindergarten, first day of show and tell......each of which will also be our first time as well.
Speaking of firsts in case you are curious a new baby is what got me started on this whole blogging thing. I remember sitting there in front of my computer on my lunch break March 7th, 2006 wondering if I had anything to say that would compare to the dozens of other Daddy bloggers out there. Here's the result:
"Baby Fred where are you!!!Baby's room painted...check.Floors good and clean...check.Crib, cradle, swing, and rocking chair put together and safe...check check check check.House ready to be shown to the millions and millions of future visitors....check...sorta.Baby Fred......still not ready....oh ok we can wait......we'll just pass the time by watching TV....or ummm I know I can cut grass.......let's rent a mov..ie... thumps twiddling... TV's boring...grass not growing....movie no good...BABY FRED WHERE ARE YOU!!!!!This is torture....."
Three years and some months later that check list is being written a second time, I should be smarter....I should be wiser....and I guess in some ways I am....but the truth is that the same mix of excitement and trepidation is still there. Thoughts of how things will be, what will we name it, what will it's personality be like, sneak up on me at all hours of the day making it hard to focus on anything for too long. The one thing that is different....the one thing that is guaranteed to make this second go around easier is that under all the fear, excitement, curiosity, nervousness, and worry lies the simple fact that I'm a good dad and we are good parents. We are not the best, we are not the worst, but we know it and everyday we strive to do better than the day before. Regardless of what lies ahead this confidence and our faith is sure to make all the difference when it comes time to welcome our new baby into the world.