Sunday, September 27, 2009

Swine Fever

When you have a family of any size weekends are almost as busy and the weeks that lead up to them. Although I do it myself every week, I don't know why everyone spends so much time praying for Friday to arrive when more often than not we're twice as busy as we are the days counting up to TGIF. Now that the this particular weekend is finally coming to a close, I realize that for some reason as I drove home from work on Friday all the while thanking the good Lord that I made it to the close of another week, I may have placed a curse on all the little piggy's of the world. It seems I've torn a pretty large swath through the pig population in the past 72 hours.

I'm not proud of it and I've definitely didn't do any favors for my already skyrocketing cholesterol numbers, but my meal choices this weekend have consisted of: 1 jumbo pork BBQ sandwich, two sausage breakfasts, 1 round of grilled pork chops, and to make matters even worse (for the pigs, not for me) I attended my first greased pig competition this afternoon. I must say that growing up in Alabama I'm used to hearing redneck jokes that revolve around rusted up cars in our front yard been there)and going cow tipping (done that). Yes I have spent many a weekend hanging out in some field having a good time with all my buddies (those were the days)while making sure not to confuse my bottle of Mountain Dew with my Mountain Dew bottle I spit my dip in. Still I'm no Hillbillie. I mean it's not like I live in Mississippi. That being said, after 34 years of staying in the same state I now officially feel more like a true Alabamian. Maybe it was the sight of 20 kids chasing 3 full grow greased down pigs around a mud covered field surrounded by chicken wire and bleachers (not just a couple of bleachers, but like a full circle of sold out seated bleachers) or maybe I just got caught up in all the cheers and hurrahs that exploded every time a little piggy broke free and tried to run home....whatever it was for the first time in a while I did away with my snobbish, better than some trailer folk attitude and laughed my butt off. Yes it was barbaric and yes my inner PETA was screaming that something was not right about the moment, but as I walked out of the park and saw the winning pre-teen champion riding in the back of her parents brand new Toyota Highlander hugging her prized slime covered swine I couldn't help but be filled with a renewed love of my state. I don't know if they were supposed to give it to her, but this 12 year-old She-Ra literally picked up a full grown oiled up pig and sat it on a bail of hay after which myself and all in attendance admittedly became more than just a little afraid of her. The more I think about it her pigtails did look a bit more...unique compared to the rest of the girls I've seen.

In closing though I must say that this has not been all my fault, instead I present to you that I am actually a victim of some odd pig casualty related destiny. Tonight as we went to hang out with friends at our favorite sandwich shop I was determined to stop the slaughter of swine and instead ordered a nice healthy-ish turkey and cheese sandwich...only to be served a ham and bacon hogie...yes I could have seized the day, stood up for all of pig-kind, and demanded justice in the form of my original order, but hey who am I to argue destiny....besides who can say no to bacon!!!!

Tuesday, September 08, 2009

Adventures In Kitty-Sitting

Last week we the Blockhead family took our annual trip to Gulf Shores for a little fun in the sun and left our newest family members behind hiding underneath the azalea bush that runs along our front porch. I'm of course talking about our newest set of kittens from our outside cat Socks (don't ask what happened to Slippers you don't want to know and I don't want to tell you.) The yet to be named triplets arrived just a few days before our trip down south and since Nani, Pops, and Mo were each coming by at least once to check on Bottons; a quick peek to make sure all were well was only a minor inconvenience at best. After all who doesn't like kittens....okay Pops doesn't, but at this point the only people that can say no to Fred is myself and his very pregnant mommy. Anyways right off the bat we started getting reports that Socks was moving the newborns at least every other day.

Nani found them where we left them, Pops located them on the other side of the porch underneath a rose bush, Mo found them practically around the corner in another flower bed all together, and the day before we were to return it seemed that Socks and her new flock of furry felines had fled the coup all together. Never fear we found both mother and baby and baby and baby cradled safely together beneath our outside fridge (Outside Fridge perfect for keeping your Gatorade cold during the Summer and your kittens warm during the Winter. Get yours today!!! Now available in Katnip scented). All this moving though left me with more than just thoughts that it would be soooooo cool to put a GPS on Socks and see where she went, but more seriously a complete understanding as to why she felt the need to keep running for cover every night in search of safer surroundings. After all I do it every day....

Call me an over protective parent, but I'm constantly looking over Fred's shoulder to see who he's playing with, how they act towards each other, what they are laughing about or what language they are using. In some cases I don't intervene, but inevitably I find myself on occasion saying the tried and true cliche "I don't care what your friend is doing; I'm telling you not to." As a parent it's my job to steer my child away from trouble, from places that might get him hurt, from doing things that could lead to bad habits down the road (like saying My Goodness instead of My Gosh which is one step away from My God). Just like Socks as a parent I can't help but want to do everything in my power to keep my babies away from the things in this world that are bent on harming them.

Once it was all said and done, for the moment Socks and the triplets (we are thinking Inny, Minny, and Moe for the names)settled into a nice new bed I made for them on the back porch. As for Fred we are getting back to the basics; saying our prayers everday, using words like Sir, Ma'am, Thank You, and Please, less TV and more reading, he's even begun to sing along with us at Church.