Thursday, April 27, 2006

A Long List of Why's

Why are there cartoon characters on baby diapers? The baby doesn't know who Elmo is.

Why do I put down the Elmo diaper and choose the Bert diaper instead?

Why is he soooo fascinated by the ceiling fan? How can I use this to get him to stop crying?

Why did people make such a big deal out of his first Easter? For all he knows, everyday is Easter.

Why does he sit in his bouncy seat all nice and quiet during the 1 millionth viewing of a Raymond rerun, but scream his head off the second American Idol comes on?

Why do they call them diaper genies? Here's a wish "Make it where I don't have to change a 100 diapers a day!"

Why does he insist on sleeping to the one that makes me use the bathroom? His bassinet plays 3 nature sounds. Birds singing, crickets chirping, and WATER RUNNING.

Why did I eat the sample of frozen fried shrimp on isle 6, the ice cream sample on isle 8, and the gummy fruit gusher sample on isle 10?

Why didn't they have a Pepto sampler on isle 12?

Why have I still not seen the "Kramer gets a front porch episode" of Seinfeld?

Why does Fred scream like a wild banshee when his Mimi calls to see how we are handling things?

Why do parents turn raising a baby into a competition? My baby started sleeping all night at 5 weeks. My baby started at 3 weeks. My baby started sleeping all night at 2 weeks and was able to change his own diaper at 8 weeks. My baby taught your baby how to do that.

Why does he like to be held in my left arm and not my right? Are my shirts gonna start fitting me different because of it?

Why do I feel like my cats are about to throw a mutiny? Is it my paranoia or their need for more attention?

Why does Fred think it is funny to drop a bomb after I have spent 15 minutes getting him dressed?

Why can't he sleep at home like he does at Church?

Why do I think that the second he closes his eyes it's ok to plop him in the bassinet? It never works. He always wakes up.

Why is there a spotlight built into his crib mobile? It's so bright I think his eyes may be changing color.

Why do people think it's ok to just walk up and start poking at the baby? Do they like to be poked in the rips with a finger? Next time it happens I'm gonna reach over and poke them back.

Why do birds suddenly appear when you are near? Sing it with me!!!

Ok so that's my list. Time for feedback. What are some of your WHYS?

Oh and if you like what I'm posting leave a comment and tell a friend.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Sleeping through the night at 5 weeks....seriously? Who? They must have been giving that kid some Dimetap or something! :)