The DaVinci Clock is Ticking

I have a major deadline coming up. I'm trying everything I can to reach my goal, but May 19th is staring me in the face and no matter what I do it keeps getting closer.

I'm all about goals and time tables. My life is a constant "Gotta get this done by this date".
Sunday we put Fred down for a nap...let me rephrase that...Sunday Fred passed out after screaming for an hour. Not to get off on a rant but I understand the being so tired you feel like your gonna start crying and loose control of all bodily functions part. I too struggle with it everyday. The difference is Fred has nothing to do. He just eats,poops, and it's lights out. See ya in 2 hours. Same Bat-Time. Same Bat-Channel.
Why do baby's fight their sleep? Do they think they are missing out on some secret fun? Cause their not. What they are missing out on is 2 hours of home repair. Someday we'll be able to ask a 2 year old "So our viewers are dying to know. Why did you scream like somebody was yanking your toe nails out? Why didn't you just stop crying? Did you know that when you stop making noises that it's easier to fall asleep?"
Maybe then we'll find out that apparently all babies are born with the belief that the circus set's up camp during nap time. If they can just stay awake long enough they can see Mommy ride a tiger while Daddy is being balanced on the nose of a seal. Combine that with all the free cotton candy you can stomach and it's easy to see why they aren't so willing to zonk out for a couple of hours.

Anyway, back to the clock ticking in my head.

The baby just passed out. We have 1 hour and 57 minutes to clean the house.
Ready... Set...Go!

"I am going to fold these clothes and be done in 5 minutes. Then I'll spend 30 minutes talking to my mother. Then that will allow me 20 minutes to lay down before the baby is hungry again."

"Ok. I'm going eat a candy bar, pretend to watch a movie, but really fall asleep from all the sugar. I will wake up in 1 hour and 50 minutes. Then spend 7 minutes saying I'm sorry for not helping you fold the clothes." (Guess which one was me talking. lol)

I like to read. I have to read. Before Fred, I was reading about 2-3 books a month. Well that immediately ceased, no big surprise there. However, I did think that I would be able to read at least 1 book a month.
See I am the last person on this planet that hasn't read The DaVinci Code. I keep a list of books I want to read and it was never the right time, so it kept falling to the back of the list. I decided to read it before the movie came out on May 19th. After the movie comes out it will be too easy to skip the book and take the easy way out at the theater. This meant I had to step up the pace. So instead of going to the library, I bought the paperback. I had plenty of time before the movie came out. I had plenty of time. Now I'm 3 weeks away and spending way too much time dodging movie previews.

What I didn't plan on was baby Fred developing SUPER HEARING. I can understand him being awaken by the sounds of the floor creaking, a door shutting, a cat screaming as it gets beat cause it is again trying to sleep in the car seat, the phone ringing...but I never in a million years knew that pages in a book being turned make a sound that only babies can hear. I can read the left side of the page, then the right, then I just have to put the book down cause once page 3 is lifted (and I mention page 3 cause that's as far as I've gotten in a month) the second it starts its' journey from touching page 4 to resting on page 1...SUPER HEARING kicks in and I'm left trying to find away to cram 10 clowns and a giraffe under the couch cushions while Lucy distracts him in the other room