Thursday, September 25, 2008

Foot-In-Mouth Disease

Lately I've had more than my share of foot-in-the-mouth moments and since I haven't proven what a giant blockhead I truly am in a while I figured I'd lay it all out for the world to see.

Scene: The Office
Situation: Discussing the new changes I've made to Charlie with my mother on the phone
Foot-In-Mouth Moment: As I was discussing the changes I mentioned that she should really check out some of my blog buddies, specifically Weird Girl. It's no secret that Weird has been trying to get pregnant for several months now and recently she even did a post entitled "More Trials With My...." anyways I can't even bring myself to type it....just click over there and read about it. Trust me she's hilarious. Anyways I'm telling my mom she should read Weird when the words "One of her most recent was is called Let's Talk About My (Rhymes with Delores)". Which soooooo was not the title and sooooo not something I ever wanted to say in front of my mother. It only made it worse that I was in an cube farm full of eager ears just dying for some gossip.

Scene:The Living Room
Situation: Officially Jumped On A New Band Wagon
Foot-In-Mouth Moment: SEC football fans are no doubt aware of the huge rivalry between Alabama and Auburn. Families have split, marriages have ended, employees have been fired all due to which side of the feud they fell on. My entire life I have been an Auburn fan "War Eagle". My wardrobe contains no less than 6 Auburn shirts, a pair of Auburn sandles, various hats and as every father does I have passed this tradition down to Fred. Well being an Auburn fan was easy when they were good, but this year they stink. To make matters worse Alabama which has traditionally sucked is now on a major upswing with no signs of slowing down. I had been keeping it a secret that I was debating on sneaking across the border to party down with the enemy (especially after that win against Georgia) for weeks, but I slipped and made my intentions official. As Fred was leaving a message on his Nani's cell phone, searching for something to keep him talking I said the unthinkable "Say ROLL TIDE!!!" which of course is the enemy's mating call.


Anonymous said...

I don't think that's called "Jumping on a New Band Wagon"...I think that's called being a fair weathered fan!!! WAR EAGLE!!! Would you jump to the other side if Mandy had a rough year? Just joking with you!


Anonymous said...

I threw up in my mouth when I read you actually told your child to say those should teach him other 4 letter words to put together...I am disappointed. War Eagle.

the weirdgirl said...

Oh lordy, I hope your mother didn't visit my site after I posted that Joan Rivers thing, because that picture came out way more disturbing (and dirty) than I thought it would.