Lately I know it seems like my posts have skewed towards the depressing side of life. It just feels like we have been taking a beating over the past few months. Unexpected bills, unexpected heartache, just in time for the holidays. If not for Fred I’m positive life would be a much darker place than what it appears at times.
I wrote The Fog a month ago. At the time I wasn’t sure if I would ever be able to talk openly about the death of our beloved cat Sassy. I’m probably not going to go into much detail even now. The only reason I bring it up is because on October 9th we were a family of six. Equally split between gender and species. Lucy, Sassy, Booboo. Charlie, Fred, Buttons. 3 girls, 3 boys, 3 humans, 3 pets. By November 9th that was no longer the case. Last week we lost Booboo the outside cat that had followed us home after an evening walk 5 years before. She survived cold winters, hot summers, thunderstorms, and snowfalls. She was our furry little shadow.
We had been planning the yard sale for sometime and had even put an ad in the paper for this past Saturday. She disappeared mid-week and the family next door found her on Thursday. They were kind enough to put her in a tiny box so we were avoided the nightmares of Sassy that still replay in our minds on a continuous loop. I may never discuss what happened to Sassy on this site…there are too many details each wrapped in barbed wire so that they pierce the heart whenever spoken. We went forward with the yard sale, and then we closed up shop.
The stress became too much. Life has been making too many demands. Our most recent loss sent us into shock wondering if we had finally hit rock bottom and fearing what was next. So at 12:00pm Saturday, we closed the door to our house and started trying to recharge our batteries. No contact with the outside world for 2 days. The only people we spoke to were our parents (just can’t shake that GiGi). No going out with friends, no housework, nothing but getting adjusted to our new family of 4. 1 girl and 3 boys. The balance gone, echoes of the past month swirling with the wind outside, beating against the house. We even skipped church on Sunday. I’m pretty sure God understands our absence, because those two days were just what we needed. We did nothing but watch TV, sleep, and best of all…enjoy our baby boy. We laughed and played and chased him all over our home. Buttons ran through the house chasing his tail, got in on the chase for Fred, and received more love than ever. He lets Fred pet him now.
On Monday, just like that morning a month ago, the world was covered in white. The first fog since Sassy had passed. And just like last time we began picking up the pieces and enjoying the simple things in life…the sound of a baby calling for his momma…the laughter from a joke between mom and dad…the twinkle in Lucy’s eye.
PS Don’t forget to vote on Fred’s first word !!!